Snell stars after Carvalho’s shock no-show
Ambridge village green exploded in a ‘Rio-t’ of colour (trying too hard here. Ed) on Sunday as the fete made a triumphant return to its traditional home with a modern Olympic carnival theme.
Lynda Snell, stalwart of village life for 30 years, stepped in at the last minute to open the fete after Felpersham City footballer Benny Carvalho was unavoidably detained (see “My crazy coke-fuelled night with ‘Big Ben’ Carvalho’”, page 22).
Wearing a floral teagown, styled by Lilian Bellamy, Mrs Snell carried the Olympic torch around the green, narrowly avoiding setting fire to her large feathered hat. She was followed by a samba band, village children waving flags of all nations and the Edgeley Morris Men gamely trying to twerk.
Hundred of visitors then took part in activities including pitch-and-putt, archery, Dunk the Vicar, Splat the Rat and Guess the Gender of the Jelly Babies (number, surely? Ed). The WI tea tent, beer tent and pop-up Ambridge Tea Room were all highly popular.
‘Apart from a year 5 from Penny Hassett failing a drugs test before the egg and spoon final, it was a huge success,’ said master of ceremonies Kenton Archer.
Fallon Rogers, who took over the event after an acrimonious split in the committee (see Ambridge Observer, 24 July), said she was ‘honoured and humbled’ that Mrs Snell had opened the fete.
‘I completely underestimated how hard Lynda has worked all these years. It was the least Emma and I could do to make up a box of the unsold Brazilian pastries as a thank you,’ she said.
STOP PRESS: Celebration turned to tragedy immediately after the fete, as Mrs Snell found that while she was out, her dog Scruff had passed away peacefully on the Resurgam stone at Ambridge Hall. (see ‘In memoriam’ below).
Burns hopes to beat Darrington by the book
New Ambridge cricket captain Harrison Burns is employing bold ‘mind games’ tactics for this Sunday’s crucial match against Darrington.
‘I’ve given the lads a copy of Sun Tzu’s The Art of War,’ he revealed at a pre-match press conference. ‘At first sight there might not be much in common between Chinese military strategy of the 5th century BC and a game of village cricket. But I was struck by the book’s key message: ‘All warfare is based on deception.’ So all we have to do is deceive Darrington into thinking we’re good at cricket, and victory is ours.’
Burns said his reading regime had gone down ‘pretty well’ with the team. ‘Johnny Phillips said his pigs had eaten his copy, Roy Tucker thought I was talking about a Chinese takeaway, and Tom Archer said if it wasn’t about organic baby food, he wouldn’t have time to read it. But Alistair Lloyd thought it was a great idea. He said being married to Shula, he knew all about psychological warfare and could do with some more tips.’
Coffee break with… Emma Grundy
In our occasional series on Ambridge residents with interesting jobs, we catch up with Emma Grundy, rising star of the Ambridge Tea Room.
Q How does it feel to be a catering queen?
A Oh, go on… really? We’re a team at the Ambridge Tea Room. Though Fallon does rely on me for everything. Kirsty Miller helps out sometimes, but to be honest she doesn’t have a lot to offer. Just because she came up with that good idea at the football club party… Anyway, my little Keira is a princess, and I’m her mummy, so I guess that makes me a queen!
Q What’s a typical day like for you Emma?
A Well, no two days are the same! Like on Sunday, I was up at dawn making Brazilian pastries for the fete, and this morning I went to see my husband Ed’s new Texel sheep. He reckons they’ll make our fortune, but his granddad Joe says pigs might fly. I’ll be serving in the Tea Room, and this week I’ve taken on a new babysitting job too.
Q How do you juggle your career with being a mum of two?
A At the moment we’re lucky because we’re living with Ed’s family at Grange Farm, so they all help with George and little Keira. But we’ve got to move soon, so Ed and I have been looking at rented places. We saw one this week but it’s 20 miles away from Ambridge. We might have to go back to stay with my parents, although my mum’s never really forgiven Ed for throwing up on her sofa.
Q Who are your biggest influences?
A I get my work ethic from my mum. For instance, just this week I asked her advice about whether I should agree to babysit Rob Titchener’s young son Henry. Henry’s mum’s one of my best friends, after all. Mum said if I’m going to betray a friend, I should make sure I get good money for it. And it’s cash in hand, so I can treat the kids this summer. She’s like that my mum. Always thinking of others.
Your week in the stars
After the fete, what does fate have in store? Our new columnist, renowned astrologer Janet Planet, has all the answers...
Pisces No one can accuse Miss Pisces of being a cold fish this week! Desire burns hotter than a swollen udder, and a weekend trip sounds tempting, but keep your trysts discreet – you can’t make an omelette without breaking eggs, but you’ll break a heart if you’re not careful.
Taurus A chance encounter with a medical man may leave lady Taureans in a romantic spin. Will lunch lead to love? But be prepared for a bumpy ride at exam results time; teenagers may need support, especially if one sibling is a smug swot and the other is a hopeless dunce.
Gemini Farming Geminis can give themselves a well-earned pat on the back this week; your stars have aligned to help you sort out problems from mastitis to grass shortages. But remember pride goes before a fall from Lakey Hill! Young family members may not stay out of trouble for long, so don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched.
Leo Leos with a birthday this week may find themselves struggling with a moral dilemma, and will need a lion’s courage to risk upsetting friends and family by telling the truth at last. Celebrations may have an Olympic theme, and a pub may be involved, but beware leftover Brazilian canapés if you don’t fancy ‘Rio revenge’!
Scorpio Memories of an ex-partner come back to haunt you this week, and you may find yourself under pressure to relive traumatic events in your past. An meeting with a legal representative could be painful but has the potential to change many lives for the better, so follow your heart and speak up. Please!!!
Robert and Lynda Snell would like to thank all those who sent kind messages following the passing of their beloved dog Scruff.
Thanks also to staff at Eternal Paws Pet Crematorium for a lovely service, which included ‘Now thank we all our dog’; ‘Love canine, all loves excelling’ and ‘The Lord is my German Shepherd’ and concluded with ‘Somewhere over the rainbow’.
‘We lost you once after the flood, and to lose you again is even harder to bear. But we had those last few precious months together. Sleep well Scruffy; a life well lived.’